The Pig, by Joseph Jimenez

There was a man who went on an adventure.  He went over a mountain into a forest.  There was a pig, a fat pig.  He ate a lot.  He was a very muddy pig.  His name was Betsy.

There was a house with mad, mad bikers.  They went to a baseball game.  After the baseball game, they went hunting.  They shot a tortoise, and ran over a coyote.  The pig was wondering what was going on.  There was a tiger deep in the forest.  He was looking for people to eat, and then suddenly, ROAR.  He saw a little kid.  He ate the little kid.  The kid was as fat as a hot air balloon.     

Once upon a time, there was a bossy family.  The family was very mean.  They got a broom and smashed their kids up the stairs.  The kids went to get their Nerf guns, the Nerf Ultra-One.  They hopped on their cat’s back and said, “Giddy-up, Kitty!”  The kids shot the mom and put ketchup on her to make it look like blood.  The pig hopped out of the pen and split the world in half by doing a big ferocious fart.

The pig farted the people up to Jupiter.  The people came down with a broom in their hands, smashed the pig’s bottom, and the pig said, “EE-AA!”  There was a cow.  The cow was evil.  The cow kicked the pig to Chicago.  The people were saying, “Hurray!”  The people ate the cow for dinner.  The people were very, very, very, very mad.

Up and down, up and down, up and down, up and down, up and down the houses.  The houses were very spooky because it’s where the mice lived.  The pig came in and ate all the mice but one.  The pig was ferocious.  Suddenly there was a bank robber who was shooting everyone in town.  He was killing.  There was a donkey who back-kicked the robber.  The robber said, “Ouchers!”  The robber went in bed sick.  There was a big tornado.  It was the end of the world.

The End




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